February 14th, also known as Valentine’s Day, is normally seen as a romantic and upbeat holiday – but is it really as upbeat as it seems? I’m sure everyone has seen those perfect romance movies that are on TV for the entirety of Valentine’s Day, but the real world isn’t like that. In the real world, love is messy and it doesn’t always work out. It’s complicated.
While some romanticize Valentine’s Day, it can actually have a negative impact on romance. An article by Columbia Social Work Review states, “For some, the occasion is a reminder of their loneliness or broken relationships. The pressure to be in a relationship or have a romantic partner can exacerbate feelings of loneliness and inadequacy, especially for individuals suffering from depression or anxiety.” Nobody wants to be reminded of something they don’t have.
The article (titled “With Loneliness and Mental Issues on Lover’s Day”) goes on to say, “Furthermore, social media and targeted ads can instill exaggerated expectations of love and romance, exacerbating feelings of grief or disappointment”. There’s something to that. I mean, think about what really happens on Valentine’s Day. We have some people watching romance movies and wishing their partners could live up to the unrealistic standard these movies set. This leads them to be disappointed and can cause fights that can end relationships.
Even if the movies and ads don’t cause a fight, when combined with the romance genre of books that they read and the posts they see while scrolling online, they can end up with one of two options occurring: either a fight breaks out over how the person’s partner isn’t romantic (common sentences in these fights include “Do you even love me?”, “Sorry I’m asking for soooooo much”, and more) or the seeds of dissatisfaction end up being planted and eventually grow into a breakup.
People get all this pressure to be perfect and do super romantic things, and it is detrimental to their mental health. Furthermore, with all the other couples trying to get reservations to the new restaurant, or buy the tickets to the latest movie, it’s almost impossible to plan anything romantic for the day.
When the well-meaning can’t live up to the impossible standards set up by society, it leaves them being yelled at just for trying their best, and then feeling their worst. In fact, it’s believed that, “The emphasis on romantic love and couples may contribute to the higher risk of suicide on Valentine’s Day.”
Wow.
Not to mention how much money is spent on Valentine’s Day. That’s right, I went there. You see, the only people who benefit from Valentine’s Day are the rich CEOs who charge insane prices for boxes of chocolate and bouquets of flowers that are inevitably discarded. According to an article on a website called ABOUTFLOWERS,“Valentine’s Day is the number one holiday for florists and for floral purchases”. So is this day really all about love or money?
With all of these reasons, it’s not hard to see why many people, myself included, think that Valentine’s Day is a bad holiday and a plague on our mental health.